off track is good

friday again.
almost thanksgiving.
remembering.
looking ahead.
on call this weekend- it's been a long time since i've been on call.
just finished 'dealing' with the beets from the vegetable box- pink fingers again.

it has been a good week.  a week of continuing to let go. stepping outside of my time frame, my agenda, my plan for the day- and working on embracing what comes- loving the surprises- and remembering that our goal is learning- our goal is growth.  i say this about homeschooling- and i say this about me.

yesterday zoe and i were doing african geography.  we were studying east africa- the countries, their capitals, the rivers and lakes that are there- and the oceans and seas.  we were talking about the conflict in some countries and war and tribalism.  she wanted to know if our country was at war.  i said 'kind of' - we talked about afghanistan.  i was ready to move on.  i was ready to hit the next thing on our schedule. but she wanted to talk about war, and conflict and why countries don't get along- why people fight and kill each other because they believe different things.  how do you explain that? she knows something about european history and the many wars over religion and land and power- she knows about US history and about fighting for independence and freedom of religion- and ideological differences.  she knows about slavery and injustice.  but from a child- when you look at war from that beautiful, naive perspective- you remember how it sort of makes no sense. at all. she decided she needed to write a letter to president Obama. right then. right there. she needed to ask him what we could do about the fighting in afghanistan. 

i actually started to resist.  to tell her we needed to move on- and to read our book.  but then i remembered what we're doing here.  learning.  and why we're doing it- to grow, to understand, to expand the mind, to build connections. to make it real.

so she wrote her letter.  she asked why?  she asked what we could do? she said it needed to be something.  she signed her name.  she wrote ( p.s. i'm 11 years old).  she found the address to the white house- she stamped it. she mailed it.  i hope she gets a response.

it reminded me of the organicness of learning.  that listening is a huge part of teaching. sometimes following her lead is much more meaningful then sticking to some plan.  let her be an active learner. let her ask the questions.  let her know i don't always have the answers. let her see that life is process. that adults don't always get it right- that leaders and countries get it wrong.  that it's good to question things.

i want to be a more transparent parent.  i'm a very transparent doctor.  it think i'm a transparent friend.  showing vulnerability can be a strength. i want to do this more at home. i think when people know you're not hiding something- they can trust you more.  it increases relationship.  it cuts through the barriers.

today i 'rounded' on the patients i'll be covering this weekend.  i met them, i met their families.  i told them that i'd be the doctor this weekend.  that i'd check in, in the morning and see how things are- that we'd deal with the issues, the things that aren't working- and try to make them better.  again, it's about listening.  it's about being active in the process.

so maybe my days on monday - thursday aren't that different from friday. maybe life is a bit simpler than i make it out to be. maybe the same things that make a good teacher, make a good doctor, or a good parent or a good architect, or a good business person.  maybe it's honesty- transparency-listening- asking- and being willing to grow.  being willing to go off track.