new england is doing her best job of reminding me of why i never wanted to live here. it's all brown bald bark and white sky with some dull muted greens thrown in and the hollow sounds of prolonged winter. the weather feels lonely. people seem either closed up in houses or going places in cars. there is no hanging around outside, no strolls, maybe just some brave brisk walks. i'm desperate for spring but i know it's a good 2 months away.
today is ash wednesday. today begins lent.
i love the church calendar. i love the provision of place and time set aside for reflection and attention when my tendency is to hibernate and disappear until spring. these seasons give purpose during times when it's opportunity may be easily missed.
advent invites us to wait in anticipation for the birth of Jesus, in a time of the year crazed with busyness and bustle and buying things, spending money and making cards and attending parties- all good things, but the joy and the peace and the love of the divine entering humanity is seen more clearly with advent.
lent invites us to draw near to God in preparation for easter, for Christ's death and resurrection. for me, i can be so hunkered down in the doldrums of winter, holding my breath for spring, that i can miss the life-giving Love of easter. Lent, when i enter the season, is a gift to me as i look inward at the winter spaces inside of myself. what parts of me have i let dry up? have i let wither and hollow? where has grief or sorrow vacuumed the life, the joy away? how can i let the Light in? the Love in?
there is a humility in lent- ashes to ashes- from dust we came and to dust we shall return. it's a healthy humility. there is freedom in acknowledging the truth of things, of our lack of control, our limitations. from this truth, i can invite God in- the indwelling Spirit- to bring that light, the vibrant greens and the joy, to water the wintering of my soul.
the new england weather is humbling itself. it reminds me that life isn't always what i'd choose and that's okay, you put on a scarf and hat and go on. lent in the north east lends itself well to reflection if i let myself chose it rather than distraction. as i reflect on my interior world and my dry bits and wintery spaces, i will try to be gentle and draw near to God from where i am with eyes of honesty and patiently trust in the coming spring.
