last night it rained like crazy, thundering and lighting like a good old southern storm. the funny part was the electricity had been out all during dinner and clean up and the kids bedtime and then all the lights came on in the midst of this storm while we were watching 'say anything' on the battery operated laptop. but the power went out again and it stormed all night and all was still off when we woke up. so we made some instant coffee with boiled water in a pan and fed the kids cereal.
after a week here- i've begun thinking again- still observing- but also thinking. and i've been thinking about "stuff". yesterday, we went into mukono, the town we live in, to buy some locally made baskets for toy storage and laundry. on the way to town, mike and i realized we'd forgotten to ask the people who've been here for a while, what the going rate is for these locally hand woven baskets. basically we didn't want to be 'taken'. we didn't want to be 'duped'. we didn't want to be the over paying muzungus. but really, how ridiculous is that. i mean how much could you possibly over pay? but there is this weird thing that happens to me- when the culture is one where you bargain. and even though i'm a total bleeding heart for those in poverty and those with much less, i find myself caught up in this game.
'how much is this basket?'
'it is 10,000 schillings.'
'oh.... i was thinking 7,000'
'ok, 8,500 schillings for the basket.'
i'm bargaining over 50 cents. seriously. and 50 cents is a lot more to this woman than it is to me. and this basket is costing me about 4 dollars. i should probably be paying her 10$ for her time and her artistry. but there is a balance. between identity, fairness, and charity. what is the basket worth? what does it cost ugandans to buy it? who am i? and what is the interplay between these? and how should that interplay affect what i pay for it?
i don't have the answers but i bought some great baskets. hopefully i'll continue to support local industry and figure it out over the next few years.
then, today, our container arrived.
a container is one of those giant metal boxes you see on train box cars when you wait for 10 minutes to cross the tracks. it's the cargo container on a mack truck when you're driving on the highway. it's one of those appearingly tiny colored boxes on the cargo ships that make there way under the golden gate bridge and into the san francisco/ oakland harbor- that when you see up close you are amazed at how large it is. back in march we shipped about 12 boxes and four mattresses (about 1/20th of a container) from the US to Uganda. today, it arrived in our little town.
we were excited. mainly because after 5 months, we'd forgotten what we'd packed. the kids were hoping for toys that they had lost track of, i was hoping for a cutting board and just to see what i'd thought was important 5 months ago.
what surprised me as we unpacked the boxes was how much 'stuff' we have. how many things we have that once you live with out, you realize, you don't really need. three different sized cake pans. two metal spatulas, three rubber spatulas, two whisks, three cookie sheets. it's not a huge deal- but i felt a little extravagant unloading box after box of 'more'. people here are used to so little. lucky if they have a pan- not four. and after living with other people and hand-me-downs for the past few months as we've been in transit- i realized how little we really need and how much we are used to as americans.
last week, the morning of our move, i went to Target to pick up another carry on suitcase in case our bags were over the weight limit, and i had a serious "moment". it was kind of an out-of-body experience where i became acutely aware of how much stuff is at our fingertips. how many things are just one credit card purchase away. how most of us, really don't have to do with out anything, ever. for me who was about to get on a plane and move to africa- i felt incredibly sad and torn and conflicted and a little bit sick and very afraid. i kept biting my lip and trying not to cry as i roamed through each aisle heading toward 'luggage'. every turn, realizing that i was leaving this world of convenience, dragging my kids away from Batman pajamas and hello kitty umbrellas and kung fu panda dollar bin treats, for red dirt and very expensive peanut butter. that i was choosing to abandon this plethora of stuff, this life of 'normal', this situation of ease- and dragging three helpless children with me.
when i finally got to the luggage section i was so overwhelmed that i couldn't decide what was a reasonable price for a carry on bag. i was so hoping that no innocent Target employee would come to my aid and be the recipient of my insanity, because i felt like i was ready to blow- that if someone actually spoke to me- all my crazy would come out. so i picked a medium priced one, checked out and ran to the car and cried. because, it was too much, and it was too late. we were going, it was a done deal, and our flight was in 4 hours.
so now i'm sitting here with a pile of unpacked book boxes and four unpacked mattresses (that i'd obsessed over getting here) and i'm amazed at how little any of it matters and how far away Target feels and how OK i am with that.....at least for now:). and i'm feeling very thankful that i've had this chance to see how big the world is and how small it is also- and how we are both sizes too. and i'm hoping that all this will stick- that it will settle- and that my kids won't miss superhero pj's too much. and maybe i'll figure out a way to give the difference from the crap i'm not buying from the Target dollar bin, to the lady making baskets by the side of a red dirt road. maybe i'll be that kind of a muzungu.
after a week here- i've begun thinking again- still observing- but also thinking. and i've been thinking about "stuff". yesterday, we went into mukono, the town we live in, to buy some locally made baskets for toy storage and laundry. on the way to town, mike and i realized we'd forgotten to ask the people who've been here for a while, what the going rate is for these locally hand woven baskets. basically we didn't want to be 'taken'. we didn't want to be 'duped'. we didn't want to be the over paying muzungus. but really, how ridiculous is that. i mean how much could you possibly over pay? but there is this weird thing that happens to me- when the culture is one where you bargain. and even though i'm a total bleeding heart for those in poverty and those with much less, i find myself caught up in this game.
'how much is this basket?'
'it is 10,000 schillings.'
'oh.... i was thinking 7,000'
'ok, 8,500 schillings for the basket.'
i'm bargaining over 50 cents. seriously. and 50 cents is a lot more to this woman than it is to me. and this basket is costing me about 4 dollars. i should probably be paying her 10$ for her time and her artistry. but there is a balance. between identity, fairness, and charity. what is the basket worth? what does it cost ugandans to buy it? who am i? and what is the interplay between these? and how should that interplay affect what i pay for it?
i don't have the answers but i bought some great baskets. hopefully i'll continue to support local industry and figure it out over the next few years.
then, today, our container arrived.
a container is one of those giant metal boxes you see on train box cars when you wait for 10 minutes to cross the tracks. it's the cargo container on a mack truck when you're driving on the highway. it's one of those appearingly tiny colored boxes on the cargo ships that make there way under the golden gate bridge and into the san francisco/ oakland harbor- that when you see up close you are amazed at how large it is. back in march we shipped about 12 boxes and four mattresses (about 1/20th of a container) from the US to Uganda. today, it arrived in our little town.
we were excited. mainly because after 5 months, we'd forgotten what we'd packed. the kids were hoping for toys that they had lost track of, i was hoping for a cutting board and just to see what i'd thought was important 5 months ago.
 |
| our car with the boxes from the container |
what surprised me as we unpacked the boxes was how much 'stuff' we have. how many things we have that once you live with out, you realize, you don't really need. three different sized cake pans. two metal spatulas, three rubber spatulas, two whisks, three cookie sheets. it's not a huge deal- but i felt a little extravagant unloading box after box of 'more'. people here are used to so little. lucky if they have a pan- not four. and after living with other people and hand-me-downs for the past few months as we've been in transit- i realized how little we really need and how much we are used to as americans.
last week, the morning of our move, i went to Target to pick up another carry on suitcase in case our bags were over the weight limit, and i had a serious "moment". it was kind of an out-of-body experience where i became acutely aware of how much stuff is at our fingertips. how many things are just one credit card purchase away. how most of us, really don't have to do with out anything, ever. for me who was about to get on a plane and move to africa- i felt incredibly sad and torn and conflicted and a little bit sick and very afraid. i kept biting my lip and trying not to cry as i roamed through each aisle heading toward 'luggage'. every turn, realizing that i was leaving this world of convenience, dragging my kids away from Batman pajamas and hello kitty umbrellas and kung fu panda dollar bin treats, for red dirt and very expensive peanut butter. that i was choosing to abandon this plethora of stuff, this life of 'normal', this situation of ease- and dragging three helpless children with me.
when i finally got to the luggage section i was so overwhelmed that i couldn't decide what was a reasonable price for a carry on bag. i was so hoping that no innocent Target employee would come to my aid and be the recipient of my insanity, because i felt like i was ready to blow- that if someone actually spoke to me- all my crazy would come out. so i picked a medium priced one, checked out and ran to the car and cried. because, it was too much, and it was too late. we were going, it was a done deal, and our flight was in 4 hours.
so now i'm sitting here with a pile of unpacked book boxes and four unpacked mattresses (that i'd obsessed over getting here) and i'm amazed at how little any of it matters and how far away Target feels and how OK i am with that.....at least for now:). and i'm feeling very thankful that i've had this chance to see how big the world is and how small it is also- and how we are both sizes too. and i'm hoping that all this will stick- that it will settle- and that my kids won't miss superhero pj's too much. and maybe i'll figure out a way to give the difference from the crap i'm not buying from the Target dollar bin, to the lady making baskets by the side of a red dirt road. maybe i'll be that kind of a muzungu.
