best laid plans

what is the expression, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. or perhaps in my case, the best laid plans of lice and men.

poor jude- it was supposed to be his birthday dinner, with the extended family, opening his "big" present. i'd even made him a star wars cake. he'd had a fun day at his friends house. i'd strategically off-loaded zoe at her favorite aftercare program "soulshine" so i could finally vacuum the house, and bryn was down for a nap- when we left to pick them up- the root vegetables were in the oven- and the cake was done, the house- clean. things were going great! i had an hour until the family was coming.

i left the boys in the car and went to find zoe at the soulshine compound- knowing it would be hard to pull her away from the baby chicks they'd just acquired. one of the helpers pulled me aside and in a hushed voice told me she thought she'd seen a louse in zoe's hair. great. i'm sure not- i'm sure she was just -itchy. i itched and scratched the whole way home, then in the drive way with dolly parton blaring from the car- (he's alive!) i looked into that mass of blond hair and sure enough- lice. yyyyyuuuuuuccccckkkkkkkk!!! (and that other word that rhymes).
suddenly- as always happens, all my doctor knowledge is out the window- and i'm on the phone, calling my friends who've dealt with the lice thing before- because until tonight, i was a lice virgin.

i tried to contain myself- but there are only a few things that really gross me out- i'm ok with blood, vomit, poop and peoples insides. foul wounds are fine- but sputum and infesting bugs, not so good. and i absolutely can't deal with the combination of bathroom items in my kitchen- which somehow became unavoidable. "boil the brushes" my friend told me- "in the kitchen?? you want me to stick a hair brush on my stove?"

while we were still in the drive way- zoe began to freak out a little- i have to say i was too, because there were bugs crawling through her hair, because i knew this meant umpteen loads of laundry, and picking through the hair of someone who can barely handle a gentle hairbrush. and because i knew my family would respectfully decline coming over for judes birthday dinner. my whole day of planning out the window! i needed to focus on poor zoe with the lice- who kept alternating between, "this is the worst day of my life!" and "i'm so sorry that this happened" as if it's her fault. i became a screaming grump and others came to the rescue. my mom dropped off judes present and a lice kit (just meet me out in the driveway- she said). my friend with the most recent lice experience dropped off her extra lice kit- so we'd be covered. i made dinner, stripped all the beds, bagged the stuffed animals, started the laundry and , yuck, boiled the brushes. mike dealt with the hair-washing, and the nit picking (luckily, no nits!).

what's so funny about this evening is how typical it is - the foiling of the plans- i had specifically wanted this day to be all about jude- because so much of life is all about zoe. it was the first day in a long while, where i had been able to arrange a day with no zoe therapies to drive to or wait for, no rushing out of the house to get her somewhere. i wanted him, at least on his birthday, to have it be about him. so he had a play date, he got to choose the meals and the music in the car (yes dolly parton), and he didn't have to always come second- and then of course, - zoe comes home with lice- once again, not that she would have ever asked for it, she accidentally steals the spot light! he had to wait to open his gifts, wait to eat his dinner and then get his hair deloused too, just in case. jude- happy birthday- you'll be a better man for it.