it's the last day of the year, i'm sitting in the dark except for the little lights, listening to vance joy. this is part of why i love december. it's packed full of special things.
things like waiting and remembering and ending and looking ahead. it's a time of reflection. taking moments to be thankful, to be sorry, to be honest, to hold things. to see what was. to sort, to take and savor what you want to keep. and to release the things that bound you, (even things you once thought were good for you, things you thought you needed, maybe you need to be free of them). and it's a time to see what could be. it's a time for hope and new chances. it's time to enter in.
it used to be about resolutions.
it's not about that anymore.
resolutions sound rigid and forced and check-listy. what i really want is growth into wholeness. i don't want to pull myself up by my bootstraps-it never lasts- i want renewal. i don't want to start something or stop something- i want to learn something. i want to keep letting go of shadows and pulls and the things i've piled on myself. i want to keep climbing into places with room for me to expand, out of boxes and into the wide open spaces. to feed my soul and my body and my mind each day with healthy words and sounds and sights and conversations. to take the bitter and salty and sweet and taste them equally. i want to shed visions of anything false and shine into truth. i want resurrection. the rebirth of things forgotten or lost or buried - things i thought didn't fit, but have a place. i want to welcome all of me. and i want to welcome all of you.
i'm not just going to want this year, i'm going to choose.
i choose to be free of having to know, and choose to embrace the doubt. i choose to open the closed places and bring light to the corners. i choose to invite Love to begin the day with me and end the day with me and hold me during the hours between. i choose to allow myself to create. and laugh. really. loudly. and i choose to feel, really feel, the hard and ugly, scary things- to cry when i need to- but to live bold and brave. to be patient, endlessly patient with everyone, and especially me. i choose to be bravely curious instead of defensively armed. i choose peace with in me. openness. making spaciousness a goal.
i am going to be quiet and i'm going to be loud. i am going to allow the being and the unfolding of what is, whatever it is. i am going to watch God move with me into the great unknown - i am going to hold life lightly - because we don't know what a year will bring, or even a day.
happy new year 2017! bring it
things like waiting and remembering and ending and looking ahead. it's a time of reflection. taking moments to be thankful, to be sorry, to be honest, to hold things. to see what was. to sort, to take and savor what you want to keep. and to release the things that bound you, (even things you once thought were good for you, things you thought you needed, maybe you need to be free of them). and it's a time to see what could be. it's a time for hope and new chances. it's time to enter in.
it used to be about resolutions.
it's not about that anymore.
resolutions sound rigid and forced and check-listy. what i really want is growth into wholeness. i don't want to pull myself up by my bootstraps-it never lasts- i want renewal. i don't want to start something or stop something- i want to learn something. i want to keep letting go of shadows and pulls and the things i've piled on myself. i want to keep climbing into places with room for me to expand, out of boxes and into the wide open spaces. to feed my soul and my body and my mind each day with healthy words and sounds and sights and conversations. to take the bitter and salty and sweet and taste them equally. i want to shed visions of anything false and shine into truth. i want resurrection. the rebirth of things forgotten or lost or buried - things i thought didn't fit, but have a place. i want to welcome all of me. and i want to welcome all of you.
i'm not just going to want this year, i'm going to choose.
i choose to be free of having to know, and choose to embrace the doubt. i choose to open the closed places and bring light to the corners. i choose to invite Love to begin the day with me and end the day with me and hold me during the hours between. i choose to allow myself to create. and laugh. really. loudly. and i choose to feel, really feel, the hard and ugly, scary things- to cry when i need to- but to live bold and brave. to be patient, endlessly patient with everyone, and especially me. i choose to be bravely curious instead of defensively armed. i choose peace with in me. openness. making spaciousness a goal.
i am going to be quiet and i'm going to be loud. i am going to allow the being and the unfolding of what is, whatever it is. i am going to watch God move with me into the great unknown - i am going to hold life lightly - because we don't know what a year will bring, or even a day.
happy new year 2017! bring it
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