wow

today has been so beautiful in it's plainness. it's ordinary day-ness.  just another saturday.  a day with an extra hour of sleep because of no driving to school. a day to drink coffee slowly, watch the brady bunch with the kids, walk up monkey hill, have a slow conversation. read a little, write a little.

today mike and i had time to talk a bit about the usual- life here- what has been hard and good in this week- what we've learned or what we are stuck on.  sometimes i get stuck on how small change can be, or on how little i seem to get done when i see how big the needs are.  mike does big things.  he is that guy.  i am not that guy.  i am small change, small time.  i seem to be one person at a time, i seem to be few but deep, and i think i need to tell more stories- so that i remember that each person, every single person who breathes on this earth is so valuable- as they are- alone- just them- just one.

this week begins lent.

the season that i didn't practice as a child, but have as an adult.  a season of reflection and repentance- a time to reconnect with God's grace and mercy.

when i stop and let myself peek into the mystery of God's grace and mercy- really- all i can say is wow.

wow to what i see all around me, wow to the miracles that exists and are coming, and wow to what could have happened and didn't.

"when we are stunned to the place beyond words, we're finally starting to get somewhere.  its so much more comfortable to think that we know what it all means, what to expect and how it all hangs together. when we are stunned to the place beyond words, when an aspect of life takes us away from being able to chip away at something until it's down to a manageable size and then to file it nicely away, when all we can in response is "wow", that's a prayer."  (help, thanks, wow-- anne lamott)

this can be s a season of wow. a season of being stunned at the grace and mercy- beyond words- because despite all the smallness and the mess ups and the little- despite the plainness- despite the mundane and the repetition of our days and our selves- we are so loved. we are so valued- we can receive that grace and that mercy.

wow.

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