okay so i'm homesick.
it's so weird how it creeps up on me.
i was just bumping down some roads that were pretty bumpy and i just started to miss flat roads. i was just doing the dishes and listening to music and i started to miss my sister. to miss her and my brother and my parents and my old friends and well, my whole old life. i just had a moment and i felt that deep longing.
in 2012 i never left africa. i didn't step foot on american soil not once (well except the embassy i guess- but i don't think that counts at all.)
i need to go home.
i need to step foot back home. i need to hold the people who have known me longest. i need to laugh over old jokes, i need to have a more normal todo list, i need to have a non-instant cup of starbucks, i need to sit on a comfortable couch and watch american tv shows with american commercials. i need to go back to my church and sing with my sending community and hear the wise words of my pastor. i need to walk the marin headlands and smell the ocean and sit for a long time with people who i can just be quiet next to.
i don't need any of these things really- but they would be so nice right now.
and i know that i will have them soon, i hope, and then i will long for here- for bumpy and dirty and dark and accents and bony couches and via coffee and african praise songs and the loudness of the rain on a tin roof.
it's so weird how it creeps up on me.
i was just bumping down some roads that were pretty bumpy and i just started to miss flat roads. i was just doing the dishes and listening to music and i started to miss my sister. to miss her and my brother and my parents and my old friends and well, my whole old life. i just had a moment and i felt that deep longing.
in 2012 i never left africa. i didn't step foot on american soil not once (well except the embassy i guess- but i don't think that counts at all.)
i need to go home.
i need to step foot back home. i need to hold the people who have known me longest. i need to laugh over old jokes, i need to have a more normal todo list, i need to have a non-instant cup of starbucks, i need to sit on a comfortable couch and watch american tv shows with american commercials. i need to go back to my church and sing with my sending community and hear the wise words of my pastor. i need to walk the marin headlands and smell the ocean and sit for a long time with people who i can just be quiet next to.
i don't need any of these things really- but they would be so nice right now.
and i know that i will have them soon, i hope, and then i will long for here- for bumpy and dirty and dark and accents and bony couches and via coffee and african praise songs and the loudness of the rain on a tin roof.
3 comments:
To prevent confusion- I am hoping to go back and visit the US in the summer - not move back! We will be in Uganda for a while.
Kris, you are very insightful to realize that when you are back to visit your "normal" you will miss Africa. I expect that from now on you will always be lonesome for where you aren't. That isn't all bad. I guess it means your are fortunate enough to have more than one place to live.
Oops...I meant to say you have more than one place to LOVE. Nevertheless, I get that it leaves you always longing.
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